Signs you’re doing things for validation
Validation essentially appears to confirm that your limiting beliefs and feelings of unworthiness are untrue. So are you taking action for YOU or for confirmation?
When we make any decisions in life, it’s always important to question whether you are doing it for yourself, or simply trying to gain validation from other people.
All validation is, is to prove the validity of something. If you have subconscious beliefs that you’re not attractive, and you post a photo and receive lots of likes or compliments, you’ll have what you believe to be confirmation your insecurities aren’t true. But if nobody compliments you, the opposite will happen: you’ll believe it confirms the opinion you have of yourself.
You may genuinely you want to share your life with people; or feel that you are so secure in who you are, and if so, amazing.
The point I’m getting at is to always question what you’re trying to achieve.
If you shared those photos, and nobody gave you a single like or compliment, would you then remove that post?
Would you shame yourself and believe you must be unattractive, because why else would people view your photo and not like it or comment underneath it?
Or would you stick to the story you told yourself: that you wanted to share your experiences with other people?
From this moment on, ask whether that story you tell yourself has an underlying belief you’ve learned to develop.
None of it is true: that you are unworthy, unattractive, poor, unlovable. All of these things are just ideas in the mind.
In fact, you are the opposite: worthy, attractive, rich, lovable, dependent on how you choose to perceive your life.
Signs we’re only doing things for validation include often comparing yourself, being afraid to say no (people-pleasing), feeling unable to make decisions by yourself, and continuously seeking approval.
If you feel unable to relax without checking the likes on your posts, asking others if your outfit looks okay, or even being unable to make individual decisions without approval from someone else, start questioning where that lack of trust in yourself comes from. The universe/higher power/God has your back, I promise.
He just needs you to trust that it’s all playing out as it should, and you can start making decisions that honour your own needs: not the desire to be liked or to receive validation for your choices.
Buy tickets to my next event here! Spaces are filling up quickly, so run don’t walk.
Love,
Celine x
Good luck with your meditation workshop Celine!